Infinite Edgeless Vastness

there is a source
a true self,
a soul,
she said

and
she
fell
through
knowing

embracing
mystery…

appearing to be
and appearing not to be

songbirds and stars  
shouting this mystery

selves searching to find
what is

closer than close,
beyond time,
and
timelessness 

i have a
separate awareness, 
she claimed  

as claiming laughingly
continues
impersonally

and it seems
i am here
a figment of 
imagination

dusting as infinity
dissolving as
mist and fog
while
appearing as what is
and is not

wholeness appearing
as separateness

unknowable
infinite
edgeless
timeless
vastness…

a great mystery

this, she-who-does-not-know, 
is and is not 
every thing
and
no thing 
playing as cosmic light

no thing and every thing
as a danceless dance
laughing and singing, 
crying and clinging,
as what is
eternally momentary
infinitely edgeless
unknowable
cosmic
joke

life appearing as living itself
as appearances
as what is

arising, dissolving,
a grand twinkling glimpse,
a fleeting appearance

nothingness
playing as
appearances of
everythingness and
nothingness
and everything
playing as 
appearances of
nothing.

anita

 

Mindfulness and Nonduality at Juniper Level Botanic Garden

 

 

 

 

Glimpsing Perfection

Center for Mindfulness and Nonduality at Juniper Level Botanic Garden

I kiss the lips of oblivion and my name is abyss.
So deeply washed as this mystery I cannot comprehend
or explain how
I’ve awakened as an endless swoosh of the cosmos through my heart.

The ideas and beliefs conjured as imaginary Anita seem so selfish and small now as seamless emptiness
breathes the body and dances the music of radiant pulsing energies
complete with impersonal thoughts and images for seeing what is here now.

No where and no one to be and no thing to be or do as this imaginary symphony
of lights and sounds and yet
just for this precious moment,
an intimate view of limitless infinity… and then it’s gone…beyond gone
as flow-less flow, as perfection, a whisper of blissful not knowing, not being,
and yet being and knowing this is all there ever is,
or could be, as this appearance dissolves
as the vastness of oblivion.

Beginning and ending finally unite and ignite a flicker as this moment.
A thorn of loving loss as they spark union and disappear as the edgeless edge.
Such sweet sorrow and joy for the momentary gift of unicity when all distinctions are seen
as false and the fullness of aware emptiness is all there is.

Oh sweet sailor of the vastness…lover of tides, winds, and deep oceans…
let go and surrender your heart and head in personal destruction to the ravages of the deep
and death, to the thin shadows of bravery peering towards dawn
offering herself fully to the sun.

Let go and breathe the last breath of surrender while falling deeply and
swiftly as silent emptiness where fear and suffering await your personal death.
Be still and offer your personal treasures to the dark.
Laugh at your insanity of believing, naming, and charting a personal you apart from infinity.

And as you seek to find what you never lost,
and then see what you have always been,
just let go into death and give thanks for the infinite swirling
edgeless possibilities of appearing
as an instantaneous imaginary being…
beholding the amazing grace of raw wonder
and loss for this tiny glimpse of perfection.

anita

 

Wreckage

Pixabay

Rain falling, wind gusting, small chards of what I thought I was
instantly dissolving into bright shadowy formless forms
of loving empty
awe and wonder
as fierceness dies and lives and
beliefs burn upon
the silent hot waters of inquiry.

perceiving arises, uncaused, to no one and everyone to no thing and every thing,
as brilliantly beautiful
swirling and refracting watery songs
spontaneously appear singing heavy dirges of
who I once believed I was…and wasn’t
now seeing and knowing the seen and the unseen,
the knowing and the unknown
as momentary appearances of
empty fullness existing and not existing.

anita