Welcome…

This website is a collection of original writings, poems, and images pointing to edgeless absolute awareness.  What is appearing as form and formless is beyond understanding and these writings will collide with the reality you were taught to believe is true. 

Humans are indoctrinated to label, name, and claim what we see.  We seldom, if ever, have a raw and unfiltered perception, sense, or taste of life.  When we burn all beliefs, opinions, and knowings, and this is a near impossibility given how deeply programmed we are, what has always been shining brightly as this edgeless aware presence is realized (by no one in particular).

I point towards what is beyond the seeming “me” and “you” appearing in a solid and lasting world. As such, these essays reflect the agony of wiping clean the cherished stories of a separate me. Clarity arises when the mind is empty, and this emptying may seem to unfold over years, decades…and yet, these beloved stories of me may vanish anytime, here, now.

Nothing is gained. 

What is known directly, but not as from a mental or intellectual realm, and felt inwardly, but not as from inside a separate being, is the nearly universal belief of existing as a separate self is the root of all personal suffering. 

All believed to be personal is seen as a vapor.  Suffering only exists in the belief of being a separate me. What is is paradox.

As openness, edgeless, emptiness, pure awareness is the perfection of that which is appearing, whatever the form or formless.  The human mind is so deeply programmed to collect, catalog, and compare what is that we must discard the contents of knowing so we can see and be the peace beyond understanding which is our natural state, hidden in plain sight.   

This identity trap, this widely-held belief – that I am appearing as a separate person – creates a seemingly tangible world of subjects and objects with a separate and personal me at the center looking out upon a world of seemingly tangible things, people, and places. 

Anita

As small children, open curiosity and joy is our natural state but we lose this innocence and fluidity day by day as we are taught to name, label, and claim things, appearances, as belonging to a personal and separate me which does not exist. Appearing as a separate me is an elaborate belief system programmed into our brains.

So of course, as adults, we live in our thoughts, our incessant thinking, worrying about the future and regretting the past.  And we suffer deeply because we believe we are a separate me, and that life happens to a “me” and that this me is able to make choices and decisions. 

Seldom do we glimpse the utter perfection and sheer mystery we are unless we’re watching a breath-taking sunset or holding our new child, puppy, or grandchild for the first time.  This innocence, simplicity, joy, and curiosity still animates the body — but most seldom notice — preferring the pull of the mesmerizing stories of a separate “me” created by the chorus of demanding egos veiled within the brain.

What is is what is.  There are no words to describe what is beyond words, beyond the relative world we believe we inhabit.

Welcoming what is appearing moment to moment regardless of our opinions or beliefs about the moment may allow an infinite glimpse of what cannot be described, only pointed towards as what is.  This aliveness, this presence, seems to be appearing, yet not appear, here, now, as this infinite, edgeless, undivided, timeless moment. Words can never describe what is beyond a relative perspective. And this unfathomable paradoxical wisdom will cramp the brain.

There are no writings here about “becoming” awakened, enlightened, or any “thing” at all…time is a mental construction.  If you believe you can become enlightened then this website will irritate/trouble/confuse the separate you that you take yourself to be.   

And as for the use of italics and the blending of illogical words while writing – what is appearing is not relative and cannot be verbalized nor described using language, which is, by invention and intention, relative.  

anita

 

An Awakening Story

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