Charactering

F Minus Cartoon – News and Observer 6/22/18

I opened our local newspaper this morning and saw this nondual comic while looking to see if my name was listed in the obituaries just like Carl Reiner’s advice suggests. Seems I need to eat breakfast now. 

I took myself quite seriously until the early 1990s when I began looking more deeply into the Eastern religions and philosophies. Something akin to Grace swept me towards A Course in Miracles and the teachings of Buddhism in the early 1990s when I saw that I was under the spell of a deeply rooted belief of appearing as a me, a personal self.  I learned through ACIM and the Buddhist studies and meditations that I was being lived as this fleeting appearance of life. 

And yet it certainly feels like we have a center, yes?  On the one hand, it appears this moment I have a centerpoint…yet this moment falls away, so on the other hand, I do not.  I certainly thought I was separate until one day in 1990 I noticed I as Anita was a well-developed concept and set of beliefs.  This beginning of an intellectual seeing was absorbed by studing and practicing the teachings of Gautama Buddha while attended the Kadampa Center in Raleigh.

A realization that we are not separate and lasting is not easy to uncover with all we have been taught and learned about ourselves.  We feel the aliveness streaming through our body and infer there is a center to this sensating  streaming, that there is a me, a thinker, a doer, who is experiencing the streaming aliveness in time and space, right? 

And I know I’m in a minority since most believe there is a personal consciousness with private thoughts experiencing the world.  There is not.  You can begin noticing what is breathing you…walking you, sleeping you, and filling the brain and mind with a steady stream of thoughts and bodily feelings as you claim this river of thoughts as yours and personal to a you.  

And since we can feel this aliveness and these sensations of sight, sounds, touch, tastes, smells, thoughts, emotions, and feelings, we are certain the indivisible symphony of perception has a separate me and you to experience it…but there is no separate perceiver: what seems to be appearing, if anything could appear at all, is impersonal consciousness, aware presence, awaring itself. I love this word “awaring.”  I use it more since I’ve read the writings of Alfred Sorrenson, now known simply as Sunyata. This word “awaring” points more clearly and naturally to the true essence of “awareness” than does the word awareness, in my opinion ūüôā

This wondrous and impersonal aliveness, this awaring, fills you, is you, dissolves you, leaving you feeling breathless, and yet, feeling just as ordinary as the oatmeal in your breakfast bowl. And you feel this aliveness but you cannot capture it and squeeze it into a personal body…nor step outside of it…it’s undivided, limitless, and has no edges, like the illusory nature of the sky.  

And for those I’ve spoken with that have become the final answer, most report this awaring is nearly unbearable at first…this realizing you are it, that it is you, and all there is is impersonal consciousness/ awareness awaring and dreaming a relative dream, and not even that.  

This realization can feel like the dry death of all you know and love until the heart finally and completely opens to infinity with unending compassion flowing across all you see as God in action. And I am, and you are, That.

You appearing as a character may be rendered immobile by this seeing, or not. You many perceive and feel this seeing and awaring in the body as a naturalness like walking in the rain or watching a sunset, or not.  And perhaps the acute awe and shock of it all seeps in slowly, or not, and wipes the metaphorical mental slate as clean as a whistle. And sometimes the slate of mental debris appears to continue falling away.  Some pilgrims and teachers feel the deeply rooted mental debris continues to rise up to the light and shed as long as the character seems to appear.  The more I know the less I know.  

Yes, most everyone you know and love may believe you are nuts at first for going against the grain of what we are taught.  If you are lucky enough to be in a tribe of pilgrims searching the depths of the heart and mind – you are blessed.  I cannot imagine not having someone to talk with while walking this pathless path away from untruth.  This compassion is the motivation for writing these posts for you.

On the path, I seem to have left a wake of family and friends who did not understand my need and yearning for questioning everything, for  different paths of spirituality and philosophy, and my perpetual silence, aloofness, and seclusion.  And yet I felt, and still feel, deeply compassionate for all beings and all suffering, my character included, arising as appearances of a dream of what is.  And yes, even the emptiness is empty as Buddhists say. 

If you relate to this post, consider commenting below as I know others readers value your comments.  Sharing your words and perceptions may be just the perfect pointer or question readers of this blog want to read.  And of course, you cannot mess up, make a mistake, or make a wrong turn.  All is well and is as it is my friend.  

anita

 

Understanding Nonduality

Philosophy of Nonduality

Self Inquiry

Removing Ourselves from Ourselves

Lake Gaston – Island Goats – 2010

Consensus Reality

Have you ever pondered the beliefs we cherish about the world we perceive? For instance, do you believe in an external, concrete world that’s tangible, independent, and outside of you? Most of us do, I did, until someone asked me if I ever considered all the beliefs I had accumulated about life, about reality, about the world. It was a head-scratching moment for me.

We are taught to believe a consensus reality of the world with us/me located at the center of what our senses are comprehending.  This is how we are wired to survive. Maybe one percent of us are eventually able to see beyond the relative world to see aware presence, aware of itself as aware presence, as the character or doer, and as Absolute dreaming its own dream as Itself.

When there is a consensus of beliefs this sets up an alternate reality which is innocently shared, and communicated. The world is flat. There is a past and a future. Humans will never fly, or go into space, or land on the Moon. Most of us at one time believed there was one consistent and enduring reality referred to as the world and the universe. We now know this is not so, but I definitely would not have believed this in 2010 even though I had studied the nondual teachings and A Course in Miracles since 1989.

Our human brains are wired to label and compare this to that for our very survival — to measure, judge, and separate reality into inner and outer realms based on a belief in an objective and relative world of subjects and objects.¬†I was surprised to realize the volume of beliefs I held to be truths without ever investigating them for myself. I was living from a consensus belief of the world, and when I realized this I felt stupid. Why had no one ever mentioned we were living in an illusory consensus reality? I wondered if others had been seized by this realization, and if so, where were these kindred folks? I found them at a local Inquiry Group quietly peeling the onions of beliefs and concepts. (This is perhaps one of the greatest blessings in my life, finding my tribe).

Trusting in a consensus set of beliefs, we “miss the mark” of perceiving¬†what simply is¬†because we ignore nature’s laws which are governed by quantum principles and not by mere human beliefs. Did you know the definition of sin is “missing the mark” and this language, as I understand it, is used widely in the sport of archery.

Pivoting

But honestly, how are we to remove ourselves from ourselves while perceiving the world? ¬†We cannot remove ourselves as long as there is a body but it appears we can surrender to being confused, being in pain, suffering, being clueless about what we really need. It is at that tender moment that God/Grace seems to open an interior door allowing us to see we are traveling in the wrong direction and comprehend just how programmed we really are. It’s frightening to realize we are living as robots and readily swallowing a conceptual consensus overlay (culture, science, education, religion, history, philosophy, etc…) added over and covering what is simply original, fresh, pure, and fleeting…as this moment.

How humbling it is to see we are seeking truth in exactly the wrong direction. What is the direction? Close your eyes and pivot, and you have it ¬†— it’s this breath…here…now. The direction of the pathless path is never deeper into the brain/mind. The direction is in the opposite direction, it’s out of the brain and towards the heart…from claiming, naming, and labeling to letting go, surrendering, and being here now without the mental commentary about the now…just innocence, freshness, newness, without needing or knowing a single label, name, or description about what is appearing as this moment.

That’s perfect peace…living here, now, open, completely vulnerable, simply not knowing, and knowing that no amount of knowing will ever explain the unexplainable. Yet we still try to communicate what is beyond words and understanding through music, art, dance, writing, and pointing towards nature.

Brain/Mind Internal Storage – Separate Me and My World

When we pivot, we begin to see the brain cannot record and store this present moment, this now. The brain is only capable of storing and recording a story about the now-that-just-zipped-by in awareness. ¬†In other words, the brain only stores the past, a memory, a story about the moment. The brain can never record this moment since this moment is too fleeting. This moment appears and disappears so quickly that any perception of it or description of it is always in the past. Mostly,¬†we are living the stories of the brain’s memory banks that we tell ourselves about this moment or about me. Rarely are we awake to what is here, now, fresh, original, as this.

I urge you to examine your beliefs, and then examine your examining, and then examine you. This work of dissolving our identities as personal selves is not for the average human as most of us are too comfortable being our illusory selves. I’ve seldom met an original thinker as most of us just swallow what we are taught and graze on the fodder of well-meaning parents, teachers, preachers and the tribal and ancestral customs. I notice there are very few with a profound and burning desire to peel the layers of falsehoods, to deeply look within and explore the dark shadows of beliefs and grasp how we create separation and reality with these beliefs, and finally awaken as original, edgeless, absolute infinite identity.

Subtraction – Backing Away from Untruth

I found out directly that we cannot move towards Truth/God/Absolute/Divine (we already are that) but it seems we can back away from, subtract, and dissolve all the beliefs and concepts that are not Truth thus making an easier go of seeing Truth in all its radiant glory. This process of backing away from untruth is really the basis of the teachings the great sages (Jesus, the Buddha, St. Teresa of Avila, Meister Eckhart) have been pointing towards.  Sadly, most of us do not have ears to hear nor eyes to see these paradoxical truths, nor are we willing to surrender deeply enough to realize the Truth already burning brightly within and without, here, now, as this fleeting perfect moment. 

Dark Night of the Soul

So few are willing to spend time and energy in solitude examining the layers of the little self to see all the layers building up the walls of separation and personal identity. I’ve read a few stories where awakening is spontaneous… Ramana Maharshi quickly comes to mind and there are a few others but most authentic awakenings seem to arise after years, even decades, of solitary introspection, inquiry, and painful dark nights of the soul. There is much peeling away and dissolving into thinner and thinner versions of self. And yes, the peeling and thinning continues. This was/is the case for me and most of the dear ones I know awakening within the dream as the dream.

Know this: you cannot mess up, you cannot get it wrong, you have never made a mistake, you are perfect just as you are, even if you do not believe it. There is only this here now.

Before I close, I encourage you share your comments and questions below…I’d love to hear from you about this post and also read your suggestions for topics or specifics for new essays.

anita

Thinking About Thoughts?

Juniper Level Botanic Garden

When we begin to soften, to let go a bit, and perceive with an attitude and lens of not-knowing, we ease into vulnerability, rawness, and a willingness to meet and greet what is appearing instead of living in our mental processes (thinking, thoughts, ideas, beliefs, memories, and imaginings).

A deeper understanding of what is appearing resides beyond the brain’s conditioned mental processes and this deeper knowing unfolds on its own when we deeply question and meditatively inquire into our cherished inner dialogues and stories. But what does this jargon mean in simpler terms?

The ability to see how the mental processes operate provides a few ways to “crack open” and explore the habitual mental processing mechanism which many refer to as the mind or brain. I like Paul Hedderman’s use of the term “mental processing” since it shows no mercy for the habitual and sneaky mental machinery – so we’ll go with his term here.

During meditation or prayer, or while sitting quietly, we may turn our attention to thoughts and notice the thought stream, aka, the mental processing, until it plays itself out while we offer no merit to be placed upon the content any more than we place content upon the clouds passing across the edgeless sky.

During meditation or sitting quietly we may also notice our thoughts roaming free in all directions. Again, we place no judgment, opinion, or rule about how thoughts “could or should be.”

We may use thought to detect thought. ¬†Notice to see if you can watch thought without using thought. How did that go? Seeing how this mental processing works is the first step towards living as our natural and abiding inner peace which never moves, nor changes…but is obscured and ignored when we live as the mental processes.

You’ve likely heard the metaphor comparing thinking to a river. You are relaxing on the bank of a beautiful and peaceful river just watching the water move along as it does. You can do the same with thinking and thoughts…just watch thoughts as you would watch a river – allowing all thoughts and thinking to pass freely across the screen of awareness without going into a story or thinking. Just notice thoughts and when you go into thinking, move attention back to noticing, again and again. Eventually you will quickly notice when you are in the story of yourself instead of the rawness of the moment because the story feels heavy and constricted and/or flooded with yearning, resisting, or grasping.

Do you know the difference between thoughts and thinking? Perhaps this will clarify some of the stickiness for you: A random thought like – “I need to wash dishes” is passing across awareness. ¬†It’s just a thought, one of millions passing across awareness. I do not claim it or make a story about it with the mental process of naming, and claiming. If I do claim this thought as mine and how it impacts my life then I’ve gone into thinking and story-making All thinking is story-making and vice-versa.

Thoughts are just raw, random, energy flowing as pure awareness. Thinking pulls in the emotional and psychological land-mines we create in support of our personal narrative – I’m a clean-freak and keep a clean and tidy kitchen or I’m a slob with a weeks worth of dirty dishes stacked in the sink. See what I’m pointing towards?

Simply paying attention to what is appearing without the mental processing machine allows the raw and fresh seeing of what is appearing without any story or commentary about a personal me. But first we must begin to see the workings of the mental processing machine in our head. This is why meditation and meditative self inquiry is so important in seeing what is and uncovering our natural and abiding inner peace. And sadly, many confuse our seeing of what is appearing with the habitual story projected by the mental processing machine over the pure awareness of what is.

It is difficult if not down right painful to inquire within as the mental processing is serving up defensiveness, jealously, anger, envy, and hatred for what is arising. Where do these reactions arise and to whom? What is noticing these passing states and feelings?  We must be open, raw, and vulnerable to allow a quiet blanket of unknowing and a hot cup of tea to warm and enfold us as we quietly sit and unravel these prickly threads that weave the illusory personal self into a believable entity.

Paying attention to how we are responding to what is offers us clues to where we are on the pathless path to peace.¬†And when we deny our shortcomings we often see them appearing in others so we can remember to do the work of self-inquiry.¬†Are we open, raw, vulnerable to the moment or closed and habitually already knowing “the content” of the moment because we are going into the depths of memory? Memory is dead. Some nostalgia feels good but this too is a trap for staying in the mental processes and missing the beauty and gift of this moment. (Eventually we will see that nostalgia and all memories are actually new and fresh this moment, but that comes after we see the inner workings of the mental machinery and we’ve explored all the repressed stories that promote suffering.)

Only this moment is alive, raw, fresh and pregnant with the possibility that we will actually open to it like a small child accepts what is appearing – and really experience the wonder and delight of beholding what simply is. Once we are able to behold what simply is showing up without any judgements and stories we are on your way to uncovering our natural inner peace that passes all understanding….in other words, we see and swim within the deep inner peace that is beyond the mental processing, when all the naming, labeling, comparing, and claiming are seen for the nonsense they are. This is seeing through the delusion and misperceptions that the mental processing.

Deeply explore and listen within to what is appearing here now with openness, with fearless honesty, and really see the patterns and habits of clinging to and defending a personal self. Only with clear, raw, and innocent inquiry will the mental processing begin to free itself from its mechanical conditioning and relax as this natural aware presence and compassionate understanding of and for this moment.

And we will see clearly that this compassionate peace and pure awareness has absolutely nothing to do with any religious or philosophical trappings and beliefs whatsoever.

anita

 

Longing

Juniper Level Botanic Garden

Most of us long to fix and improve ourselves and make an imaginary entity (a me) feel better, even more spiritual. Religions are famous for perpetuating this notion of being a separate and personal self in need of redemption.  We innocently turn to spirituality, religion, alcohol, drugs, sex, and money to fill the emptiness we feel as separate beings living separate lives, where nothing separate can possibly exist here as this edgeless, seamless, aware conscious presence we call life.

There is no inside or an outside to be found, no edge, no ability to segment or measure what has no beginning and no end. Only Mystery and wonderment that anything at all is appearing. The perception and the recognition are not separate…there is never awareness without perception or perception without awareness. Sit with that and you’ll understand this deeply.

We are programmed as small children through learned words and ideas shared with us, usually from our parents, of the nature of the world and what we are experiencing with our senses. There is a collective, unchallenged belief that we are separate beings so we create and perpetuate the beliefs in a subject and object reality where none actually exists, except as a belief. This is the mental process that we claim as personal and specific to a me.

What we really are is like a transparent lens through which life is aware of itself. There is nothing personal in reality….only impersonality projected on the screen of itself to experience itself as life.

Some of us, very few, come to know that the real problem is our belief in having and being a separate self. To see this common misperception is a huge revelation and game changer – for once seen, then we can drop all the tools and intentions to fix the imaginary separate self which has never existed…and just relax in the ease of being here now.

anita

 

Essence of Emptiness

There is no longer any-thing to grasp, no solidness upon which to stand, just an imagining of birth and death breathing what is appearing and dissolving. Permanence dissolves and is gone beyond gone.

I inhale empty universes flooding the heart as icy white light. I exhale edgeless, infinite, starless, stillness. Before and after dies seeing edgeless, infinite, timeless presence.

Sorrow and joy arise echoing the faint notes of meaningless fears. All the edges of form evaporate and there is only whispers of a silent, inky, stillness holding what is appearing here now as creation.

My head is gone and only you see the mirage of it. How can I describe what is impossible to describe with mere words and phrases? Yet I am writing upon the emptiness and writing seems to appear. It’s so puzzling to a human brain to ponder an intelligence so timelessly infinite and absolute it cannot be comprehended.

And it feels like this:

Before me is the fullness of what is appearing now…a voidless void glimpsing appearances as itself. I have no boundaries, no skin, no need nor urge to divide and separate this appearance of raw limitless perfect aware presence.

Tears of joyful sorrow flow…and oceans appear. Laughter paints the sky as imaginary stars.

There is an ease of noticing what is appearing and a feeling of intimacy as the thought steam describes the perfection of what is appearing. This intimacy and closeness feels as though you are tasting, smelling, touching, and seeing this dreamscape within your infinite and edgeless beingness. Such paradox, mystery, awe, and wonder that anything at all seems to be appearing.

Appearances look so damn real and tangible. Such feelings of awe for a brain so clever to create the appearance of a tangible reality where none could possibly exist.

It’s all me, all of it — I inhale the cosmos and I cannot get in front or behind it, above or below it….it is everything appearing as nothing and nothing appearing as everything as each glorious inhale and appreciating this edgeless, sourceless, timeless mirage as the exhale.

And this body, this glorious vaporous appearance of a dreamy body that feels so real and tangible but is simply an imagining within a brilliant illusory brain. How divine and luscious to feel this body, this perfect moment.

And yet I appear as the gut-wrenching murderous news on TV, as children gliding on the swings, a baby fox scampering across the garden, a homeless woman, a red truck, the laptop, the fire, the sky, the ocean, a tiny ant.

Now….this moment is fresh and new, is all for you as you:

Open your eyes to your eyes and see the original and innocent seeing that is always here now.

When you were fresh and new as a toddler and a small child this original and innocent seeing was what was looking through your eyes. As you grew as a toddler, your parents, siblings, and teachers taught you a subject/object framework for seeing which covered the innocent seeing you were born with.

See again as a toddler what is appearing as this perfect, timeless, essence now. Notice the urge to measure and write distinctions across appearances to slice and dice what is infinite and edgeless perfection into parts and pieces time will never touch.

I’d die a zillions deaths to share this with you now and tell you of your perfection. I’d roll up the universe and swallow it to give you a glimpse of your illusory and infinite beauty, perfection, and timelessness.

Go outside on a clear night and look upwards to the appearances of the stars…can you divide the sky? Do you notice the gratitude arising for the simple seeing of the brilliant starry vastness before you?

Now turn your head and look at your feet. Do you notice a powerful urge to name and claim what is appearing as your feet?  If so, are you sure you want to divide and label appearances into subjects and objects with you at the center as the viewer or perceiver?

Peace radiates naturally and effortlessly as you unlearn and unprogram the brain of the attachments to beliefs and concepts keeping you a prisoner in a tangible-appearing world of illusions.

anita.

Easy Breezy Waking Up

Nonduality at Juniper Level

Greetings,

I am not surprised to read the misleading content below from a well known and respected website about the science of nonduality:

Nonduality is the philosophical, spiritual, and scientific understanding of non-separation and fundamental intrinsic oneness.

 

For thousand of years, through deep inner inquiry, philosophers and sages have come to the realization that there is only one substance and we are therefore all part of it. This substance can be called Awareness, Consciousness, Spirit, Advaita, Brahman, Tao, Nirvana or even God. It is constant, ever present, unchangeable and is the essence of all existence.

 

In the last century Western scientists are arriving at the same conclusion: The universe does indeed comprise of a single substance, presumably created during the Big Bang, and all sense of being ‚Äď consciousness ‚Äď subsequently arises from it.

 

This realization has ontological implications for humanity: fundamentally we are individual expressions of a single entity, inextricably connected to one another, we are all drops of the same ocean.

 

With “factual” information like the nonduality information above circulating over the internet no wonder seekers are popping up everywhere lately as they “awaken to their true nature.”

“That there is only one substance and we are therefore all part of it.”  Tell me please how this works – how do you have parts and parcels of an essence that is timeless, edgeless, undivided, seamless, infinite?  Can you divide the sky and be a separate piece of the sky?

Nonduality is a philosophy of not-two, undivided, indescribable, immeasurable. But it certainly feels really good to hold hands and sing that we are all part of the same aware consciousness while ignoring the main tenets of nonduality: there is no personal self, is no personal consciousness, no personal awareness, no time, no location, no space.

The universe or reality may appear as awareness here, now, this moment, but there is no external reality. There is no separation into seven billion human units each with their own private thoughts, desires, and feelings.

There is only one…as in not two. And there is not even nothing beyond nor before this moment.

Moments cannot be strung together unless you are creating a fictional story or an irrelevant running commentary about what is appearing now. Even those claiming awakening are still believing in concepts of time and space, still believing in something, some essence, lasting beyond this perfect moment.

Be careful of most nonduality teachers until you completely vet them…some will use your innocence and take your money all the while feeling good and helpful since they honestly believe they really are enlightened.

Here is the gritty grit….it’s much too difficult, if not nearly impossible to awaken to absolute truth. The nonduality and new agey groups, seminars, programs and churches popping up now are teaching oneness, nonduality, and enlightenment but are sadly misinformed and/or they are misperceiving nonduality teachings and offering pleasant and upbeat pablum to folks to fill the offering plates and their wallets.

We long to uncover the natural, peaceful, and intimate timeless perfection as awareness since we have forgotten what we are…and it feels like a wound that will not heal.

And what better way to ensure the survival of the new-agey seminars, conferences, and churches than to tell you that you are part of the oneness, part of the whole, part of the infinite love and joy. Sounds so empowering and peaceful, right?

Certainly I am not suggesting all leaders of new agey programs are intentionally misleading the public…they may believe they are teaching nonduality.  A little bit of nondual language may seem impressive, and may soothe the hurt until you come upon a fully awakened nonduality teacher and begin seeing beyond the fabrications and the pretending. And yet, this too, is the perfection of the appearances.

So what’s the difference between human truth and absolute truth?  Let’s have a brief look below, while knowing this topic deserves a much deeper examination and self inquiry.

Truth projected from the relative brain/mind of a human is the sum of thoughts woven tightly from complex concepts, hypotheses, theorems, laws, norms, prevailing wisdom, consensus, facts, and conclusions accepted by all as collective truths. Like gravity, time, location, and chocolate ūüôā

Absolute truth is a different critter… beyond the limits and dualistic nature of the relative human brain. So in order to awaken to what is, you must, must, must, understand how the brain/mind works, is programmed — to ensure you continue believing you are separate.  And that’s the focus and work of this website…to keep re-minding you.

  • Absolute truth is not relative and the brain is relative.
  • Absolute truth is not subject to language and phrases based on subject or object.
  • Absolute truth cannot be taught, shared, described…only pointed towards. If it is describable it’s not Absolute Truth.  Words like abyss and void come as close as any words I’m familiar with but even these words conjure beliefs and opinions of what a relative void or an abyss is, or could be.
  • Absolute truth is only uncovered by diligently peeling away the beliefs, concepts, opinions, convictions, and physical laws hiding the perfect silent brilliance.
  • Absolute truth cannot be earned, bestowed, transferred, diminished, expanded, refined, defined, or claimed and comprehended or understood with a brain/mind.
  • Absolute truth is not measured with time, location, distance or any other relative system of measurement since Absolute truth is all there is …and yet is ignored, overlooked, and dismissed by 99% of humans.
  • Awakening is not what you think. ūüėČ  This is the reason self inquiry is the tool for exploring all the beliefs and concepts you worship and keep you appearing glued together as separate.

anita

Changes

Today you’ve landed on the updated nonduality website which is nearly complete. I’ve transferred most of the prior nonduality essays to this new site and I’ll be sharing nonduality teachings at this new web address:¬†www.nondu.org.

I wrote you two weeks ago of these web changes, but in case you didn’t read the post here’s a recap:

Website changes are coming…

I‚Äôve decided it‚Äôs time to migrate the current mindfulness pages and posts to a static informational website and focus on¬†nonduality writings going forward. Perhaps turning 60 this year is a catalyst ūüėČ

This site ‚ÄúMindfulness and Nonduality‚ÄĚ will soon be redirected to¬†www.nondu.org. ¬†

If you have already signed up for email notification of new posts, self inquiry sessions, and nonduality retreats you will continue to receive an email from MailChimp letting you know I’ve added new content to this site.

If you would like to subscribe to the posts on nondu.org please sign up in the top of the column to the right. I never share your information with anyone and all I need to subscribe you is your email address, not even your name!

Please stay in touch with your comments and questions and feel free to bend my ear anytime. ¬†I’m here so let me know what you would like to read, and or where you believe are stuck on the pathless path.

anita

Relationships

Nonduality at Juniper Level

Today’s essay is brought to you by the joys and heartaches of relationships.

I received a note this week from “I’m Outta Here” — a younger fella who is about to strangle his very chatty girlfriend and wonders how awakening impacts relationships. This is a good question as it sends us straight into inquiry to look at the nature of “other.”

Below is my reply to this young man in case this paradox is arising for you too. ¬†ANDRemember we have Self-inquiry Saturday, June ¬†10, 2017 at Juniper Level Botanic Garden¬†from 2:00 – 3:30pm.¬†Feel free to bring your camera and a bag lunch if you want to hang out before or after our gathering to spend some quiet time in the gardens…and you may want to bring some mosquito repellant ūüėČ

Dear I’m Outta Here:

Bart (Marshall) told me when I awakened that the hardest part of awakening is relating to “other” ¬†and he is so right. ¬†Many relationships cannot weather the seismic shifts when one awakens.

I continually struggle with wanting to be alone and reclusive while knowing that Tony/other helps me see where I am constricted, judgmental, and selfing.

If I lived in a cave or totally removed from the flow, and I am laughing as I type these words cause I am the flow….there would be so much less texture, emotion, selfing. I am giddy with delight pondering a solitary life in a cave… yet I know selfing can sometimes be shaved clean by scraping against the grain and texture of other.

I feel your pain.¬† J and I have often discussed how cool it would be to have a “wise-woman-house” so we can go days without speaking or interacting with “other” with no need to explain the pull of silence or the lack of interest with interacting or in offering comments or preferences.

I’m here for you dear one. I know this is a hard topic and hindsight in relationships seems to be 20/20. ¬†I was totally insane to marry again, yet the heart seems to have it’s way and leaves the rational brain in the dust. ¬†Remember we are being lived. ¬†There is no decider.

anita

Advaita Vedanta

Nonduality at Juniper Level

I devoured the paradoxical and powerful teachings of the Ashtavakra Gita and other Advaita teachings on the spiritual path.

Advaita (the Sanskrit word meaning “not-two”) are the scriptures within the ancient Vedanta teachings pointing towards a singular omnipresent energy. ¬†Meaning “not-two” and, as such, Advaita is the essence of all matter, all particles, visible, invisible, excluding nothing, and including all, even you, me, and God, Universe, Source.

What is is impersonal consciousness, uncaused and spontaneously appearing and disappearing as what we mistakenly perceive to be subjects and objects in a time and space filled universe. ¬†What seems to be appearing is indivisible, immeasurable, edgeless, spaciousness, and infinitely and presently conscious… if anything is appearing.

I spent more time with this poetic yet disturbing scripture than any of the other ancient Eastern teachings I read and studied from 1992 Р2010. I read these teachings each morning upon arising and again in the evening before going to sleep.  I even carried a copy of this Gita in my shoulder bag to read while waiting in line at auto mechanics or the grocery store.

For me, the Ashtavakra Gita was a gift of wordless words pointing towards the vast and edgeless void, dissolving false concepts of the personal self and brain/mind like no other scriptures I’d ever studied.

The Ashtavakra Gita directly and clearly¬†challenge the beliefs and concepts of a separate and personal self and a ¬†separate and tangible reality or creation. ¬†I prefer to read my teacher Bart Marshall’s translation of these sacred teachings. ¬†Bart’s books are available here.

anita